“Shocking at the inefficiency and complete lack of common sense” – Irish Times

Louise O’Leary’s long-term plans always included returning to Ireland after several years abroad, but the bureaucratic challenges she encountered upon returning to her home country were “really unexpected”. .

After graduating in Occupational Therapy from Trinity College, Dublin, O’Leary was recruited to work in Singapore. She had never visited or researched the country and went to the interview anyway “for the experience”, but she was offered the job. “I took it because it was a good job. I first worked in a hospital and then moved to working with children in a private clinic,” she says.

“I fell in love with the opportunity to travel and work there. As a foreigner, taxes are really low so it’s easy to save money.”

For the first few years, most weekends, O’Leary spent his holidays “travelling to other countries like Malaysia” and going out and making friends with locals and mixed Irish people. “Making friends with locals was better because they don’t tend to leave. Asia is like a revolving door, people tend to only stay for a few years. But I also made good friends. But in the end, you can build a good life.”

“I was thinking of maybe moving to the Middle East, but I hadn’t decided yet. But I always said, ‘I want to be gone by the time I’m 30.’ Turning 30 seemed like a big milestone.”

— Louise O’Leary

Living in Singapore was “of your own choosing” and “there was a big culture of eating out, but it wasn’t as expensive as Ireland,” she says. “There are also eateries that are open 24 hours a day. If you’re meeting friends, you don’t necessarily have to go out for drinks. There’s a very strong fitness culture in this city, so that was the main way I made friends.”

Ms O’Leary loved the “opportunity to learn about so many different cultures” and found Singapore to be a “beautiful place”.

After five years of living there, O’Leary met her current husband, Arif. “I spent some quality time there. I had plans to leave at that point. I was probably going to move to the Middle East, but I hadn’t decided yet. But I always thought, ‘By the age of 30, “I want to leave this world,” he said. “Turning 30 seemed like a big milestone,” she laughs.

“My partner didn’t want to break up after being together for a year or two because he was still working and gaining experience. So we ended up staying about two or three years longer than we had planned.

[ ‘Singapore has the busyness of a big city but is less stressful than others’ ]

“I know it’s okay to go home. We’re at my mom’s house. She lives in Cork now, but Kelly’s house is empty. She uses an Airbnb in the summer. “If we were trying to find a place to rent, it would have been very difficult,” she said, adding: We asked around and it didn’t happen, nothing happened at all.

“I think I also knew that it wouldn’t be the same when I came back. When you live abroad, everyone tries to see you within the two weeks before you get home. But when you come back, you can’t be there full-time. I knew it wasn’t there.”

A year on from her return, her social life is “much quieter” than it was in Singapore. “In Singapore, she might have asked to meet for coffee tomorrow, but here she has to make plans with the person a week or two in advance,” she points out. “We’re all at different stages in life, and I always knew this was going to happen, so it wasn’t really a shock. I still have a group of friends, but only one of them I see regularly is my girlfriend. It’s just the two of us or the three of us.”

The couple have traveled a bit in Europe, including Spain and Portugal, and are grateful that they are “still able to travel since their baby boy was born” and are “making the most of” their time in Europe. are doing.

Ireland “has definitely become more multicultural, especially Killarney, since I left,” she says. “My husband is Singaporean, so it’s not that strange to see non-white people on the street. Maybe 10 years ago he would have gotten more attention.”

As far as the family goes, it’s like O’Leary “never left.” “She bounced right back,” she laughed.

Ms O’Leary and her husband have agreed to a “three year trial” in Ireland to see how they can settle down with their children. “We want to make a decision before they have to go to school. I’m happy to stay because we get along well, but if he’s finding it difficult in the end, I I’ll be happy to stay. [leave] In the same way. That’s a compromise. Because it’s a big change for me too. I had more freedom in the big city of Singapore,” she says.

There are a lot of things you have to adapt to, such as different tax systems, jobs, and finding childcare. “For the time being, we’re not going to buy a house or buy expensive furniture or anything and lock ourselves into anything. There are a lot of challenges. All these things we don’t even think about when we come back. did.”

“Even switching your license as a foreigner is difficult. It’s all about political decisions about which country you’re associated with.”

— Louise O’Leary

I waited several months for my driving license test. Living in a rural area, she said, “you can’t go anywhere without anyone,” and the waiting list affected O’Leary’s ability to be independent. “Switching your license as a foreigner is also difficult. Things like which country you are associated with are all political decisions. If the Irish government wants its citizens to come back and contribute, should be a more streamlined process.

[ ‘In Singapore you are a lone ranger… What I love about living in Ireland is everyone looks out for each other’ ]

“To say I am shocked by the inefficiency and complete lack of common sense of the various people we have had to deal with is an understatement,” said Ms O’Leary, who said the couple married in Ireland. , explained that she gave her husband the right to marry. Stamp 4 visa – “and a seemingly simple procedure to get it”, but the process was complicated and instead the couple faced “inappropriate comments” from immigration officials.

“The second round was just as bad. Common sense would suggest that once this visa is issued, you’ll be issued a PPS number, which you’ll need to do everything else after you move.” But no, we needed to start that process and the NDLS (National Driving Licensing Authority) refused my husband’s request for PPSN to transfer his license to an Irish one. ” says O’Leary.

“Banks won’t open an account without that number. The list is endless. He had been looking for a job from Singapore for over a year but had no response. So we were stuck. ” she says.

The couple ultimately appealed the request for a driving license, and Arif was issued one in December, three months after arriving in Ireland. “She once got on the phone with a woman at the bank who said, ‘Why do you need a bank account if you don’t have a job yet?'” O’Leary says.

The “scandalous” shock of the move has also made it difficult for O’Leary’s husband to find a job, including his car insurance.

But despite the difficulties, O’Leary now feels more settled back home and says supporters of the move are “lucky”. “Children’s benefit helps with monthly costs. The boys get free GP care, so I feel safe at their age. I can take them with me without worrying about the cost,” she says. . She said her “family’s support during this unusually busy time” has been invaluable and “being able to manage two small humans and be there for my family has been invaluable.”

“I don’t know what the future holds for us. Based on my experience with my husband so far, I’m leaning toward retiring because I can’t really stand up to him anymore,” she said. Masu. “No matter where I end up, I plan on making the most of this trial move and every opportunity to make memories.”